Our new house is 7 doors down from a really great playground and park. There are two school playgrounds within a half mile and another public playground just over half a mile away. If we walk a little over a mile south we hit a large park on a lake (two playgrounds, long walking trail around the lake, paddle boats, etc) and in the surrounding neighborhoods another nice playground. There's another park southwest of us that is technically walkable but I find it most useful as a stopping place when we need to waste time after a trip to the library or church or grocery store. Those are just the parks within walking distance (I define walking distance as the length of sidewalk I can traverse with 80 lbs of kid in a double stroller and 12 pounds of kid in a carrier of some kind). Within 10 minutes of our house there are too many parks to count but we've started hitting the ones we've found. Now that area schools are out of session I'm sure we'll have even more fun at parks, but the following is a description of our particular interactions at the park.
June - June's goal at any park is to make friends. In fact, if she can ascertain from halfway down the block that there are no "friends" at the park, she gets pretty depressed and may not even want to go to the park. A friend is defined as...well, anyone really. She would prefer a 4 year old girl but if not that then a boy of similar age will suffice. Big girls are intimidating but definitely intriguing. She may spend the whole park visit standing on the curb just watching and listening if there are enough big girls there. Toddlers are fine, but June tends to strike up conversation with their mothers once she realizes they aren't interested in playing with her. Conversation is as follows, "Hi, this is my brother, Ruben, he's two. That's my mom and my baby sis-tah. I'm four." Sometimes she'll approach moms of older children who have decided not to play with her and ask his/her mom if the child will play with her. She's getting pretty bold. Tonight there was a really tall two year old girl playing with her parents and older brother. The girl loved to run around and every few minutes you would see June running after her yelling "you want to play with me." The girl didn't even acknowledge June's presence but that didn't dissuade June from trying.
Ruben - Ruben goes for the smallest toy available may it be sand, dirt, woodchips, or pebbles. These toys must be piled, dumped, moved, and thrown - although we're working really hard on remembering not to throw them at all and have managed to at least keep him from throwing them at people - unless that person (babies included) first throws the woodchips/sand/dirt at him. Then all's fair. Ruben has yet to meet a climbing apparatus that he can't climb. His particular favorites are the climbing walls. He's wary at first and asks mom or dad to watch him but once he's got the hang of it, he shimmies up the wall super fast. He and June both prefer to play on playgrounds without shoes no matter how hot or uncomfortable walking on woodchips may be.
Kendra and Iris - Iris spends most of her time at the park in carriers of some kind. Since my cousin Rachael is emptying out the house and getting rid of all her baby stuff, new and exciting carrier are keeping us busy trying out what works best. For long distance walks I prefer the Ergo so I can switch Ruben to my back when he gets tired of the stroller and Iris can hang out with June in the double stroller. Short distances I prefer the sling for quick transitions and my new long wrap (Storchenweige) for when I know I'll be standing around for a while. I try to strike up conversation with anyone who's there (maybe that's where June gets it). Today I had a long conversation with a mom of a 19 month old about breastfeeding, yesterday I talked with a mom and grandma about the Renaissance Festival, last week I talked with a really skinny Polish mom about how much milk was too much milk for her 3 year old, and every once in a while I'll actually see someone I know (or someone who knows someone I know). With every relocation I've become more and more comfortable striking up conversation with complete strangers - I know from experience that these could be my new best friends.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Our first month as a family of five
Wow! Where has time gone. It seems that first crazy week might be a compact reflection of life going forward. Iris is five weeks old and last night slept through the night (10-5:30). She probably would have slept through the night the night before last as well but I woke her up at 3:45 to save myself the effort of getting up to pump. Her typical day look like this. Wake up at 5 to eat, sleep til 8, eat again, sleep until lunch time, eat again, sleep until 4, wake up and be fussy while I try to make dinner, eat (usually when I want to eat), stay awake until 9ish, eat again and hang with mom and dad after the kids go to bed, sleep some more. We've started to get glimmers of smiles from her during her awake times, but mostly she's a sleeper. We left her last night with the McCabes while we went out to eat with some couples from church. That was her first full bottle, and it took her forever - probably because she more used to having food shot into her mouth rather than having to suck it out herself.
I can't win them all.
Ruben's new best friend is "Eee-vI" or in layman's terms Levi Hooker who is about 3 months younger than Ruben. We've spent a lot of time with the Hookers in the last 3 months and it has been wonderful to watch their relationship grow. At first, they could only interact for about 10 seconds before one or the other was hitting or screaming. Right before Iris was born, they took a turn and started playing together but as it happens with 2 year old boys, it still ended in punches and tears. Now, there is still plenty of violence but it seems to be more a part of the game even though Rachael and I discourage it outright. We don't tend to leave them alone together very long and I think we might be justified in that behavior given the mayhem that broke out at Iris' baptism party. Not exactly punches...
Iris was baptized on Sunday, May 12 at 11 am. Karl finally got to baptize one of his own kids. Blake and Sarah Ramsey are her sponsors and managed to view the baptism via video chat along with Aunt Betty and Rick and Pam. So at first, it was just Karl, Iris, and I at the front of the sanctuary, but Ruben soon joined us. I woke Iris up about 10 minutes before the baptism to give her some time to calm down before getting dunked. She stared quietly at Dad while he talked and then when he was starting to get longwinded fussed a bit to get things moving. Karl's pretty liberal in his water pouring, but Iris stayed pretty calm during the actual baptism. At the after party at our house, Aunt Julie, Uncle Paul, Aunt Jane, and Papa quickly identified the shell Karl used to pour the water as a shell once owned by Mort and Dolly. It was used as an ash tray for years. I'm sure there's significance there theologically, but don't think too hard about it. I just found it impressive that my aunts and uncle could identify that particular shell from across the room. It looks like any old shell to me. Other friends and family that came for the event were Great Grandma Schaefer, the Casads, the Schmitzers, the other Fays, and the Hookers. It is so great to be close enough that we can share these life events with so many great people.
Enough about the baby already, right?!
I"m pretty sure Ruben thinks this in his mind at least a couple times a day. The thought is quickly replaced by "oooh...I feel like kissing that baby" which he does with much frequency. Unfortunately, she's most susceptible to his kisses when she's sleeping and his kisses are not tender, soft pecks. They involve both hands on her head, lips pressing, a bit of slobber, and a loud smacking sound.
Ruben's big trick lately is his ability to fall asleep anywhere. We're in the stage of the dreaded 5 pm nap. Too late to keep a strict 7:30 bedtime and too early to sleep through the night, I do everything in my power to keep the child awake until dinner even if it means bribing him with Dora or M&M's. Sometimes I just can't catch him in time and I notice a sudden hush has fallen over the house. Then I go on my search for the sleeping 2 year old.
Ruben's new best friend is "Eee-vI" or in layman's terms Levi Hooker who is about 3 months younger than Ruben. We've spent a lot of time with the Hookers in the last 3 months and it has been wonderful to watch their relationship grow. At first, they could only interact for about 10 seconds before one or the other was hitting or screaming. Right before Iris was born, they took a turn and started playing together but as it happens with 2 year old boys, it still ended in punches and tears. Now, there is still plenty of violence but it seems to be more a part of the game even though Rachael and I discourage it outright. We don't tend to leave them alone together very long and I think we might be justified in that behavior given the mayhem that broke out at Iris' baptism party. Not exactly punches...
What will they come up with at the Lake in the years to come. Look out, Weller cousins, these two are a new breed of Wellertives.
And finally, June. I only write about her last because she's mature enough to be patient. At least in a blog that she can't, as of yet, read. Poor oldest children are neglected when a baby comes along and June has done her best to be as cute as possible and when that doesn't work, as whiney as you can imagine. Her room has a full size closet with mirrored doors. With the hardwood floors and no real rug, it turns her room into a veritable dance studio. She's expanded her dance moves to include spinning, this adorable head shaking thing, and graceful flying wings. In fact, at church a few Sundays ago as I herd kids out of the pew to go to communion, June pulls out her imaginary wings and gracefully flies up the side aisle. Ruben exits the pew next, sees June flying and jauntily flaps his wings behind her...all the way to the front.
At Iris' baptism party, all three of June's best friends were in attendance - Hallie, Vera, and Lucy. When I asked her what she was going to do with all three of her best friends, she got this intense look on her face and said, "I'm just going to take all of those girls into my room and play." When Hallie had to leave, June was pretty sad because I'm pretty sure she thought Hallie was moving here for good. So sad :(
I do envy June though. A sister is something I always wished I had (Katie and Starla, you guys count, but you never lived in my house long enough). June is a marvelous big sister and loves to help dress Iris - morning, noon, and night. She also loves to hold her, but quickly gives her back if she starts to fuss. Now that Iris will actually stay awake for more than 10 minutes at a stretch, June can be found sitting or laying next to her on the bed or in the bouncer singing songs and telling stories. Iris is calmed by June's presence (almost as much as she is on alert in Ruben's). I love to watch this relationship grow because I'm watching something totally new to my experiences - the love that grows between sisters. Brad and Paul, I love you guys, but I'm glad June has a sister to love as well as a brother.
Sunday, April 21, 2013
The first week with Iris
You never know what to expect when you bring a baby home from the hospital. How will life change? Who will have the first meltdown - the 2 year old, the baby, the mom, the 4 year old? Will I sleep? What were we thinking!
Bringing Iris home felt so good. She had been long overdue and I was so ready to show her off to all our new friends in Palatine who have been praying so fervently for our health and safety through this whole process. I had an inkling from the start that she'd be an easy baby so I felt confident that the transition would have its rocky moments but overall would be an easy thing. Iris' first outing was to church on Sunday morning. Nana and Papa were there to take care of June and Ruben so all I had to do is walk into the building (carrying nothing but the diaper bag), sit down in church, and show off our daughter. One hour later I was exhausted and Iris had slept the entire time. Home again, home again jiggety jig. Ahh...time to relax and get to know Iris. The cutest newborn thing she does is her "silent cry." She'll be laying in the bouncer or on the floor and if she needs something she starts crying but no sound comes out of her mouth. Her face is all scrunched up and her body is writhing but no sound. Usually someone notices that she's "crying" before she gets to the stage where a scream might pop out. I'm sure she'll grow out of it, but for now, silent crying is the best newborn invention ever. Communication without the hearing loss. Nana and Papa have been a huge help this last week but by Monday it is time for them to leave. Nana left frozen burritos in the freezer, a fridge full of fruits and veggies, and extra presents for June and Ruben when we feel like Iris is too much the center of attention. Papa converted Ruben's closet into an awesome fort by taking down the hanger bar and shelves and adding a ladder up to this really cool kid space. We'll just have to decorate it eventually.
Tuesday morning I had planned to take fairly easy at home, but the kids were definitely cabin feverish and I figured I'd waste just as much energy trying to entertain them at home as I would if we got out of the house. So we went to the library story time. The kids really enjoyed it (we sang five little monkeys jumping on the bed - how could it be bad) and we even got our new library cards before we left so we could check out some new books and movies. It was just after 11 so kids are getting hungry, I'm getting hungry and I realize that with the new books in the diaper bag, Iris in her carseat, and Ruben pulling at my hand, it is going to be a terribly long walk out to the car. By the time we get there, I'm shaky, the kids are still hungry, and Iris is still sleeping (thank the Lord!). I pull out granola bars to tide us all over and drive home where I manage to walk upstairs and turn on a Dora movie before I collapse on the couch. I lay there until Karl comes home for lunch. He feeds the kids and himself and gets me some food as well while I lay on the couch in pain. My back hurts, I'm engorged to the hilt, I'm pretty sure my blood pressure is too high and I have a headache. Pretty much the worst I've felt in a while. Why did we go to the library again? I put in another movie after Karl goes back to work and curl up to sleep. Thankfully, Karl's able to come home early from work before an evening meeting so I have some time to collect myself, medicate myself, and empty myself of excess milk before dinner. Wednesday will be better, I tell myself even though by 8 that evening I'm feeling pretty cruddy again. Did I mention that Iris has been perfect this whole time. She eats and sleeps. Whew.
Wednesday is a fantastic day and thankfully so because Thursday does not start out well. Iris has been sleeping really well at night with only one meal around 2 or 3. Wednesday night she went to sleep around 10:30 and at 4 I realize that Karl is tromping around downstairs and that Iris is still sleeping. I wake her up and feed her because I need her to eat, and Karl comes in to tell me that there is standing water in the garage because it has been raining nonstop for the last 6 hours. By 5 am, we're both downstairs with a shopvac and bucket trying to figure where to put all this water before it overflows into our finished basement (new carpet even). By 5:30 our next door neighbor Steve has his shopvac in our basement as well and we're furiously trying to manage the influx of water. Kids start waking up so I once again stick them in front of a show in our bedroom (best morning ever, in Ruben's estimation) and when I come out I see at least three different neighbors in our front yard conferring with Karl and Steve. Next thing I know one of them is back with a submersible pump and 20 ft of pvc pipe. Just in the nic of time (water is now level with the step up into our house - I'm avoiding the basement because I assume it will be flooded next time I walk down the steps), the pump makes some headway and after an hour of pumping there's only an inch or two of water left in the garage and after 2 hours we're nearly dry. Karl's able to get the sump pump working again (on the list of things to buy, new sump pump), and even though the rain continues to fall, we're safe. The sewer line is full so we have a little bit of seepage from our utility room but by evening that has resolved as well. I would like to take this moment to say a huge prayer of thanks for neighbors who were so willing to sit out in the rain at 5:30 in the morning to help these people they've never met before save their basement carpeting. Thank you, Lord!
Friday is a normal day with Mom's PEACE group in the morning (I let Ruben and June wear sandals, and on the way there it started snowing), movie and nap in the afternoon and we got our first delivered dinner that night. Amazing! As we go to sleep at the end of our first week with Iris, Karl notes that it's snowing and sure enough, we wake up to a nice coating of snow. What a week.
I'm laying out these details because it's amazing to note that the largest struggles we had this week were not in any way related to Iris or even to June or Ruben's adjusting to her. June continues to love to hold Iris and takes particular pleasure in helping get her dressed which includes picking out the clothes which should always include a hat to match. Ruben loves to talk to "baby Iris" and really hasn't put her life in danger as of yet. Iris herself continues to give me plenty of sleep at night, nurses well, poops semi-regularly, and only cries when you change her diaper with cold hands (and then she'll tell you how disappointed she is in you!) Iris seems to know that our emotional strength was sapped in the nine days after her due date and has atoned for her behavior then with her perfect nature now. The last 3 months have been a series of life transitions, any one of which could throw a family into turmoil. Yet, the Fays have managed to weather the storm and I'm sure it is in large part due to the amazing number of people who pray for us on a daily basis. We truly appreciate these prayers and know that God has listened. While we've traversed these transitions well enough, we're ready to settle down to a normal routine. We're ready if God has yet another challenge in mind, but for the foreseeable future we've got our feet on the ground.
Bringing Iris home felt so good. She had been long overdue and I was so ready to show her off to all our new friends in Palatine who have been praying so fervently for our health and safety through this whole process. I had an inkling from the start that she'd be an easy baby so I felt confident that the transition would have its rocky moments but overall would be an easy thing. Iris' first outing was to church on Sunday morning. Nana and Papa were there to take care of June and Ruben so all I had to do is walk into the building (carrying nothing but the diaper bag), sit down in church, and show off our daughter. One hour later I was exhausted and Iris had slept the entire time. Home again, home again jiggety jig. Ahh...time to relax and get to know Iris. The cutest newborn thing she does is her "silent cry." She'll be laying in the bouncer or on the floor and if she needs something she starts crying but no sound comes out of her mouth. Her face is all scrunched up and her body is writhing but no sound. Usually someone notices that she's "crying" before she gets to the stage where a scream might pop out. I'm sure she'll grow out of it, but for now, silent crying is the best newborn invention ever. Communication without the hearing loss. Nana and Papa have been a huge help this last week but by Monday it is time for them to leave. Nana left frozen burritos in the freezer, a fridge full of fruits and veggies, and extra presents for June and Ruben when we feel like Iris is too much the center of attention. Papa converted Ruben's closet into an awesome fort by taking down the hanger bar and shelves and adding a ladder up to this really cool kid space. We'll just have to decorate it eventually.
Tuesday morning I had planned to take fairly easy at home, but the kids were definitely cabin feverish and I figured I'd waste just as much energy trying to entertain them at home as I would if we got out of the house. So we went to the library story time. The kids really enjoyed it (we sang five little monkeys jumping on the bed - how could it be bad) and we even got our new library cards before we left so we could check out some new books and movies. It was just after 11 so kids are getting hungry, I'm getting hungry and I realize that with the new books in the diaper bag, Iris in her carseat, and Ruben pulling at my hand, it is going to be a terribly long walk out to the car. By the time we get there, I'm shaky, the kids are still hungry, and Iris is still sleeping (thank the Lord!). I pull out granola bars to tide us all over and drive home where I manage to walk upstairs and turn on a Dora movie before I collapse on the couch. I lay there until Karl comes home for lunch. He feeds the kids and himself and gets me some food as well while I lay on the couch in pain. My back hurts, I'm engorged to the hilt, I'm pretty sure my blood pressure is too high and I have a headache. Pretty much the worst I've felt in a while. Why did we go to the library again? I put in another movie after Karl goes back to work and curl up to sleep. Thankfully, Karl's able to come home early from work before an evening meeting so I have some time to collect myself, medicate myself, and empty myself of excess milk before dinner. Wednesday will be better, I tell myself even though by 8 that evening I'm feeling pretty cruddy again. Did I mention that Iris has been perfect this whole time. She eats and sleeps. Whew.
Wednesday is a fantastic day and thankfully so because Thursday does not start out well. Iris has been sleeping really well at night with only one meal around 2 or 3. Wednesday night she went to sleep around 10:30 and at 4 I realize that Karl is tromping around downstairs and that Iris is still sleeping. I wake her up and feed her because I need her to eat, and Karl comes in to tell me that there is standing water in the garage because it has been raining nonstop for the last 6 hours. By 5 am, we're both downstairs with a shopvac and bucket trying to figure where to put all this water before it overflows into our finished basement (new carpet even). By 5:30 our next door neighbor Steve has his shopvac in our basement as well and we're furiously trying to manage the influx of water. Kids start waking up so I once again stick them in front of a show in our bedroom (best morning ever, in Ruben's estimation) and when I come out I see at least three different neighbors in our front yard conferring with Karl and Steve. Next thing I know one of them is back with a submersible pump and 20 ft of pvc pipe. Just in the nic of time (water is now level with the step up into our house - I'm avoiding the basement because I assume it will be flooded next time I walk down the steps), the pump makes some headway and after an hour of pumping there's only an inch or two of water left in the garage and after 2 hours we're nearly dry. Karl's able to get the sump pump working again (on the list of things to buy, new sump pump), and even though the rain continues to fall, we're safe. The sewer line is full so we have a little bit of seepage from our utility room but by evening that has resolved as well. I would like to take this moment to say a huge prayer of thanks for neighbors who were so willing to sit out in the rain at 5:30 in the morning to help these people they've never met before save their basement carpeting. Thank you, Lord!
Friday is a normal day with Mom's PEACE group in the morning (I let Ruben and June wear sandals, and on the way there it started snowing), movie and nap in the afternoon and we got our first delivered dinner that night. Amazing! As we go to sleep at the end of our first week with Iris, Karl notes that it's snowing and sure enough, we wake up to a nice coating of snow. What a week.
I'm laying out these details because it's amazing to note that the largest struggles we had this week were not in any way related to Iris or even to June or Ruben's adjusting to her. June continues to love to hold Iris and takes particular pleasure in helping get her dressed which includes picking out the clothes which should always include a hat to match. Ruben loves to talk to "baby Iris" and really hasn't put her life in danger as of yet. Iris herself continues to give me plenty of sleep at night, nurses well, poops semi-regularly, and only cries when you change her diaper with cold hands (and then she'll tell you how disappointed she is in you!) Iris seems to know that our emotional strength was sapped in the nine days after her due date and has atoned for her behavior then with her perfect nature now. The last 3 months have been a series of life transitions, any one of which could throw a family into turmoil. Yet, the Fays have managed to weather the storm and I'm sure it is in large part due to the amazing number of people who pray for us on a daily basis. We truly appreciate these prayers and know that God has listened. While we've traversed these transitions well enough, we're ready to settle down to a normal routine. We're ready if God has yet another challenge in mind, but for the foreseeable future we've got our feet on the ground.
Finally, the birth
My last post was April 8th when I implied that our baby would soon be entering the world. I didn't follow up with that post right away because I was angry. Our baby did not come on Monday the 8th or Tuesday the 9th or Wednesday the 10th or even Thursday the 11th. In fact, once contractions stalled out on Monday afternoon, I didn't even have any inkling of labor signs for the rest of the week. I felt great and was incredibly frustrated that I wasn't feeling horrible (as in labor horrible). Nana and Papa came up on Tuesday and thank goodness they did. The distraction of having someone else care for June and Ruben and cook meals gave me a little opportunity to relax and come to terms with the idea of induction. The doctor was by no means forcing us into induction, but we had scheduled it for Friday and quite frankly I was ready for induction even though I knew it meant not having the kind of birth experience I wanted. Pitocin means epidural after all. But as long as I ended up with a VBAC, I was fine with whatever. Plus I knew from pictures that my belly was getting pretty darn enormous and that meant the baby inside was getting that much bigger each day as well.
Thursday night we had an amazing get together with 30+ Schmidt Family cousins. Miriam and Jeremy were in town from Bratislava, Slovakia which had encouraged Tom and Kathy to come in from New York. A party's not a party without Gretty, Gogo, and Pootie, and Dad had decided the week before, baby or no baby, he was going to be there too. The people that actually live in the Chicagoland area were also there (Lehmann's and Niermann's) so Rachael and Chris have officially won the award as the best party throwers for the year. It was so much fun to see Vera, Ursula, and June playing together as if they've always been best friends and to catch up with all my aunts and uncles at a locale that was not Lake James. I was actually happy to still be pregnant just so I didn't have to miss such an amazing opportunity. But by 6 the next morning I was ready to sign the eviction papers for this little bundle of joy.
Since Fetal Fay waited so long to be born, she did get the opportunity to be born in a brand new hospital with amazing cavernous rooms and nice fresh equipment. The only down side to the new hospital was the nurses and doctors were still figuring out where everything was. Any time a supply was needed, the nurse would look in at least two locations before spotting the item she was in search of. It was actually fairly humorous most of the time. By the time we filled out paperwork and stuck me with an IV and took blood samples, it was nearing 9:00 and then Dr. Johnson came in and quickly broke my water. I was still only 3 cm and maybe 60% effaced. I had scheduled the induction with Dr. Peter Johnson but his partner, Dr. Susan Orhan was also on the floor that day so she popped in from time to time. She was less happy that I was so overdue and a VBAC patient and pressed me to get an epidural right away just in case we needed an emergency C-section. Thankfully, the nurse knew my wishes and called Dr. Johnson without my asking and he said "epidural or no epidural, whatever she wants to do." Thank you. So we labored. I was on a low level of pitocin so I knew the contractions were harder and more erratic than they would have been naturally but I was willing to try it for a while. Mostly I was afraid if I got an epidural too soon I'd be too numb to push and wouldn't be able to VBAC. By 1 in the afternoon I was ready for an epidural and only pushing 5 cm. The contractions I felt and my emotional state were comparable to the way I felt during transition when I was laboring with Ruben. The pitocin made it impossible for me to rest fully between contractions and that knowledge made me want to just stand up and leave this whole labor behind. I'd be pregnant forever if someone would just make the contractions stop. The anesthesiologist came in and soon I was able to contemplate rest. There was a strip of my belly that didn't take the epidural so I still felt contractions but only down the left side of my belly (weird sensation by the way). I was still plenty able to move around in bed from side to side and within a half hour or so I was at 8 cm. The nurse called Dr. Johnson and by the time he showed up I was ready to push. This was the part I was nervous about with an epidural because with June I had been so completely numb and unable to move once I had been on an epidural for a while. But this was fine. The first contraction of pushing was learning curve but I managed to get her crowning, the second contraction got most of her head and then the third one popped her out. Wow. that was nearly easy (It wasn't, but it has been a week so I've already forgotten how much it hurt).
It's a girl! Iris Annette! Wow. It felt so good to just hold her and know that I wasn't pregnant anymore. Ahhh. She was caked in vernix, that lovely cold cream like substance that keeps babies from pruning in the womb. Most babies are born with some vernix but by 40 weeks most kids have started to kick the habit. By 41, it's odd to see a baby with it caked on like this. What can I say, she thought she needed to stay in a bit longer.
While I'm holding her and Dr. Johnson is finishing up the clean up, everyone starts guessing her weight. I guessed 8 lbs 12 ounces or something like that because I knew she was big but she looked so small. Dr. Johnson thought there was no way she was that big and guessed 8 lbs 2 ounces. The nurse who took her to clean her off a bit, picked her up and went "whoa, that's a big girl." Once she was wiped down a bit, we all watched in eager anticipation as the scale calibrated her weight. It took a while, but we finally ended up at 9 lbs 7 ounces.
WHAT!!! You have got to be kidding me. That's enormous! There is no way I just pushed out a 9 and a half pound baby. I think I said something to that effect at least 10 times while we were still in the labor and delivery room. I was stunned. I knew she was going to be big but that seemed a bit obscene. And quite frankly it hadn't been that hard. What would it be like to give birth to a 6 lb baby. I guess I'll probably never know.
By 6 in the evening we were settled in our post partum room and June and Ruben and Nana and Papa were visiting. By 8 when they finally left I realized how exhausted I was (and how much I had to pee). Since I had only really had the epidural for an hour and a half or so (not the 6 hours I had with June), I was able to get up and walk around pretty quickly and felt like recovery was going to be fairly easy. My blood pressure had been pretty high the last three weeks of pregnancy and continued to be close to 150/90 throughout my stay at the hospital. If I laid on my left side for a half hour or so before they came to check me it would fall back into the 130/80 range but any activity would send it back up. Friday night was full of heel pricks for Iris (because she was LGA - large for gestational age) to check her blood sugar and the continued removal of tubes and wires from my body. First the epidural and the epidural tape (ouch...that's one way to have a hairless back) monitors and catheter, then the pitocin drip, then finally the next morning the IV. If only I could remove the countless bangles of hospital bands then I would feel like I could move my arms with ease. Saturday had the hearing test (passed), another visit from the kids and grandparents as well as Rachael, Vera, and Nora, PKU blood test for Iris, and quite a few blood pressure checks for me. Every time it was too high, I'd lay down and she'd come back a half hour later to make sure it had gone down. As we're getting ready to leave my blood pressure is still really high and there are implications that this one thing might keep us from being discharged after 24 hours. I can promise you that if I am told I have to stay in the hospital one more night, my blood pressure will NOT go down. Get me out of here!
These are the things we learned about Iris in the hospital. She's easy. She caught onto nursing immediately and rarely ever has latching issues. She takes a binky and sucks it with a cute little squeaking noise. She likes to sleep. Once nurses stop waking her up to test, wash, or take her temperture, I know she'll be a great infant sleeper like Ruben was. Oh, and did I mention she's beautiful. And she's loved by the best dad, big sister, and big brother any little girl could ask for. She looks like Ruben when she grimmaces and screams and she looks like June when she's sleeping peacefully. Her eyes are bright blue and with our genetics have a 50/50 chance of changing to brown in the next couple months. She has more hair than June but less than Ruben's shock of black hair and what hair she does have seems to be fairly light in color. And she's long - long arms, long torso, long toes and fingers. I can't wait to get to know her better.
P.S. I realize that this blog entry didn't mention Karl nearly as often as it should have. Karl was my rock through this process. He comforted me through the emotional aftermath of a stalled labor, kept me calm when Dr. Orhan was being pushy, questioned but backed my decision to get an epidural, and kept the outside world up to date on Facebook and by text. I knew he was controlling all the details so I could focus on the main event (if you're not aware, this is a flip flop to our usual relationship roles). He is amazing and I felt bad I didn't mention in the body of the text as much as I should have. He handled the periphery with strength and courage.
P.P.S. Ruben and June truly loved meeting their sister as the pictures show. While Ruben might at some point step on or injure Iris in some way, he loves her dearly and has to be told to stop kissing her. June just gazes in awe at her little sister and asks constantly if she can hold her. What more could we ask for in older siblings.
Thursday night we had an amazing get together with 30+ Schmidt Family cousins. Miriam and Jeremy were in town from Bratislava, Slovakia which had encouraged Tom and Kathy to come in from New York. A party's not a party without Gretty, Gogo, and Pootie, and Dad had decided the week before, baby or no baby, he was going to be there too. The people that actually live in the Chicagoland area were also there (Lehmann's and Niermann's) so Rachael and Chris have officially won the award as the best party throwers for the year. It was so much fun to see Vera, Ursula, and June playing together as if they've always been best friends and to catch up with all my aunts and uncles at a locale that was not Lake James. I was actually happy to still be pregnant just so I didn't have to miss such an amazing opportunity. But by 6 the next morning I was ready to sign the eviction papers for this little bundle of joy.
Since Fetal Fay waited so long to be born, she did get the opportunity to be born in a brand new hospital with amazing cavernous rooms and nice fresh equipment. The only down side to the new hospital was the nurses and doctors were still figuring out where everything was. Any time a supply was needed, the nurse would look in at least two locations before spotting the item she was in search of. It was actually fairly humorous most of the time. By the time we filled out paperwork and stuck me with an IV and took blood samples, it was nearing 9:00 and then Dr. Johnson came in and quickly broke my water. I was still only 3 cm and maybe 60% effaced. I had scheduled the induction with Dr. Peter Johnson but his partner, Dr. Susan Orhan was also on the floor that day so she popped in from time to time. She was less happy that I was so overdue and a VBAC patient and pressed me to get an epidural right away just in case we needed an emergency C-section. Thankfully, the nurse knew my wishes and called Dr. Johnson without my asking and he said "epidural or no epidural, whatever she wants to do." Thank you. So we labored. I was on a low level of pitocin so I knew the contractions were harder and more erratic than they would have been naturally but I was willing to try it for a while. Mostly I was afraid if I got an epidural too soon I'd be too numb to push and wouldn't be able to VBAC. By 1 in the afternoon I was ready for an epidural and only pushing 5 cm. The contractions I felt and my emotional state were comparable to the way I felt during transition when I was laboring with Ruben. The pitocin made it impossible for me to rest fully between contractions and that knowledge made me want to just stand up and leave this whole labor behind. I'd be pregnant forever if someone would just make the contractions stop. The anesthesiologist came in and soon I was able to contemplate rest. There was a strip of my belly that didn't take the epidural so I still felt contractions but only down the left side of my belly (weird sensation by the way). I was still plenty able to move around in bed from side to side and within a half hour or so I was at 8 cm. The nurse called Dr. Johnson and by the time he showed up I was ready to push. This was the part I was nervous about with an epidural because with June I had been so completely numb and unable to move once I had been on an epidural for a while. But this was fine. The first contraction of pushing was learning curve but I managed to get her crowning, the second contraction got most of her head and then the third one popped her out. Wow. that was nearly easy (It wasn't, but it has been a week so I've already forgotten how much it hurt).
It's a girl! Iris Annette! Wow. It felt so good to just hold her and know that I wasn't pregnant anymore. Ahhh. She was caked in vernix, that lovely cold cream like substance that keeps babies from pruning in the womb. Most babies are born with some vernix but by 40 weeks most kids have started to kick the habit. By 41, it's odd to see a baby with it caked on like this. What can I say, she thought she needed to stay in a bit longer.
While I'm holding her and Dr. Johnson is finishing up the clean up, everyone starts guessing her weight. I guessed 8 lbs 12 ounces or something like that because I knew she was big but she looked so small. Dr. Johnson thought there was no way she was that big and guessed 8 lbs 2 ounces. The nurse who took her to clean her off a bit, picked her up and went "whoa, that's a big girl." Once she was wiped down a bit, we all watched in eager anticipation as the scale calibrated her weight. It took a while, but we finally ended up at 9 lbs 7 ounces.
WHAT!!! You have got to be kidding me. That's enormous! There is no way I just pushed out a 9 and a half pound baby. I think I said something to that effect at least 10 times while we were still in the labor and delivery room. I was stunned. I knew she was going to be big but that seemed a bit obscene. And quite frankly it hadn't been that hard. What would it be like to give birth to a 6 lb baby. I guess I'll probably never know.
By 6 in the evening we were settled in our post partum room and June and Ruben and Nana and Papa were visiting. By 8 when they finally left I realized how exhausted I was (and how much I had to pee). Since I had only really had the epidural for an hour and a half or so (not the 6 hours I had with June), I was able to get up and walk around pretty quickly and felt like recovery was going to be fairly easy. My blood pressure had been pretty high the last three weeks of pregnancy and continued to be close to 150/90 throughout my stay at the hospital. If I laid on my left side for a half hour or so before they came to check me it would fall back into the 130/80 range but any activity would send it back up. Friday night was full of heel pricks for Iris (because she was LGA - large for gestational age) to check her blood sugar and the continued removal of tubes and wires from my body. First the epidural and the epidural tape (ouch...that's one way to have a hairless back) monitors and catheter, then the pitocin drip, then finally the next morning the IV. If only I could remove the countless bangles of hospital bands then I would feel like I could move my arms with ease. Saturday had the hearing test (passed), another visit from the kids and grandparents as well as Rachael, Vera, and Nora, PKU blood test for Iris, and quite a few blood pressure checks for me. Every time it was too high, I'd lay down and she'd come back a half hour later to make sure it had gone down. As we're getting ready to leave my blood pressure is still really high and there are implications that this one thing might keep us from being discharged after 24 hours. I can promise you that if I am told I have to stay in the hospital one more night, my blood pressure will NOT go down. Get me out of here!
These are the things we learned about Iris in the hospital. She's easy. She caught onto nursing immediately and rarely ever has latching issues. She takes a binky and sucks it with a cute little squeaking noise. She likes to sleep. Once nurses stop waking her up to test, wash, or take her temperture, I know she'll be a great infant sleeper like Ruben was. Oh, and did I mention she's beautiful. And she's loved by the best dad, big sister, and big brother any little girl could ask for. She looks like Ruben when she grimmaces and screams and she looks like June when she's sleeping peacefully. Her eyes are bright blue and with our genetics have a 50/50 chance of changing to brown in the next couple months. She has more hair than June but less than Ruben's shock of black hair and what hair she does have seems to be fairly light in color. And she's long - long arms, long torso, long toes and fingers. I can't wait to get to know her better.
P.S. I realize that this blog entry didn't mention Karl nearly as often as it should have. Karl was my rock through this process. He comforted me through the emotional aftermath of a stalled labor, kept me calm when Dr. Orhan was being pushy, questioned but backed my decision to get an epidural, and kept the outside world up to date on Facebook and by text. I knew he was controlling all the details so I could focus on the main event (if you're not aware, this is a flip flop to our usual relationship roles). He is amazing and I felt bad I didn't mention in the body of the text as much as I should have. He handled the periphery with strength and courage.
P.P.S. Ruben and June truly loved meeting their sister as the pictures show. While Ruben might at some point step on or injure Iris in some way, he loves her dearly and has to be told to stop kissing her. June just gazes in awe at her little sister and asks constantly if she can hold her. What more could we ask for in older siblings.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
June, the Visionary Planner
(by Karl)
June has demonstrated on a number of occasions to have her mom's orientation toward forethought and detail (as opposed to her dad's lack thereof), but she seems to possess some of dad's more creative side.
And she has recently starting talking a great deal with her hands. Waving them emphatically, palms up, fingers loosely holding an imaginary baseball, to underscore the level of excitement and decisive action that should be elicited. She will raise her eyebrows and get this big gleam in her eyes and proceed to lay out these grandiose visions of what we should do. Today I received a call from June right as I was leaving work, "Daddy, I fink we should buy some wood... or find some wood an' we should get a hammer or sumfing an' build a birdhouse. And then we should get some paints and a brush an'... paint the birdhouse!" (emphasis added; the hand that wasn't holding the phone I'm sure was waving all over the place as she proclaimed) "Cuz we like looking out our window at the birds... and Ruben likes chasing the birds... huhuhu (chuckle to herself as she thinks about how silly Ruben is about running after birds; seriously, it's absurd!)."
So we had a special family outing tonight, and we found two very nice pre-built birdhouses from Hobby Lobby.
And we have a painting project for two older siblings tomorrow morning.
And... a show-and-tell for dad when he comes home for lunch!
June, what other grandiose dreams and plans are you going to cook up?
And when did you get so old?!
Monday, April 8, 2013
Fetal Fay
So we're sitting at home counting time between contractions and I might as well waste this time blogging instead of checking Facebook for the thousandth time. The kids are happy and safe at the Hooker's house ready for a night of fun and luckily enough the kids don't have school tomorrow so they'll have fun in the morning as well. As we sit here waiting, I'm reminded how much waiting this kid has prompted already in his/her short life. We're only five days past the due date but it might as well be six weeks because I've been ready since March 21st. Contractions have been going all day in the 3-7 minute range but only once an hour or so do I have one that causes me to stop what I'm doing. We'll go in to the hospital soon and then probably wait until someone breaks my water and then I think the waiting will stop.
So let me write now about what I think this kid is like so far. Movement has definitely been a strength of this kid. With Ruben I was impressed by the strength but for this kid it is more about the square footage covered in a single movement. A kick might start up by my ribs but by the time things calm down the entire side of my uterus has been beaten. Also, besides being generally upside down for the past few weeks, the position of this kid changes on a daily basis. He/She might be lying on the right side in the morning and by noon he/she's facing forward and by bedtime we've rotated even further around. Both Ruben and June were posterior (sunny side up) so we'll see where this little one ends up once labor gets to the good part.
Other than movement, this kid has been pretty congenial. Unless I stay up past midnight the nocturnal kicks don't wake me up although Karl has been surprised a few times in the middle of the night by the movement that I'm able to sleep through. Every once in a while I'll get a stretched out foot or hand sticking out beyond the limits of my stretchy skin but a simple touch and push and Fetal Fay complies.
Fetal Fay, we're ready to name you Iris Annette or Ezra James and stop calling you Fetal Fay (no matter how cool the name). So get moving, okay! See you soon.
P.S. I wrote this blog on Monday, April 8th. On Tuesday we scheduled an induction for Friday morning hoping to never get that far. As you know by now, Iris made us wait once again and didn't show up until April 12th and even that took a little coercing, but that's a story for a different blog.
So let me write now about what I think this kid is like so far. Movement has definitely been a strength of this kid. With Ruben I was impressed by the strength but for this kid it is more about the square footage covered in a single movement. A kick might start up by my ribs but by the time things calm down the entire side of my uterus has been beaten. Also, besides being generally upside down for the past few weeks, the position of this kid changes on a daily basis. He/She might be lying on the right side in the morning and by noon he/she's facing forward and by bedtime we've rotated even further around. Both Ruben and June were posterior (sunny side up) so we'll see where this little one ends up once labor gets to the good part.
Other than movement, this kid has been pretty congenial. Unless I stay up past midnight the nocturnal kicks don't wake me up although Karl has been surprised a few times in the middle of the night by the movement that I'm able to sleep through. Every once in a while I'll get a stretched out foot or hand sticking out beyond the limits of my stretchy skin but a simple touch and push and Fetal Fay complies.
Fetal Fay, we're ready to name you Iris Annette or Ezra James and stop calling you Fetal Fay (no matter how cool the name). So get moving, okay! See you soon.
P.S. I wrote this blog on Monday, April 8th. On Tuesday we scheduled an induction for Friday morning hoping to never get that far. As you know by now, Iris made us wait once again and didn't show up until April 12th and even that took a little coercing, but that's a story for a different blog.
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
The puzzling prodigy
So we've always known that Ruben is particularly smart. He caught onto language really early and easily. He's constantly surprising us with information that we thought might be above his comprehension level. Granted, he's socially and emotionally a normal two year old so his intelligence at times jumps out and surprises us all. For June's fourth birthday I found a 48 piece floor puzzle that I thought would be a great activity to tackle during the transition time between Davenport and Palatine. We had one floor puzzle that the kids enjoyed doing together, but Ruben never showed any particular interest in doing puzzles before I purchased this kitty tea party puzzle for June's birthday. While we were staying at the Hefernan's house for a week, we probably completed this puzzle 20 times. I really don't feel like I'm exaggerating. Ruben, especially, just loved the puzzle. With some of our gift card money we went to Target in search of other good puzzles but came back with some 48 piece junky puzzles that the kids liked but were hard to put together. His fine motor skills are closer to that of a two year old than a four year old. We received another floor puzzle as a gift and I found another one at Goodwill, so now we at least rotate between three puzzles. We also bought a whole bunch of smaller 24 piece puzzles that are quick and rewarding. Our puzzle stash is built up and now puzzle time is a regular part of the day. For a while I was impressed by Ruben's puzzle skills but assumed he wouldn't have the attention span for independent puzzling but the other day while I was in the shower I came out to a completed 24 piece puzzle on the living room floor. The kids have different strategies when it comes to doing puzzles. June likes to complete the whole edge first or at least the whole sky or the whole ground. Ruben on the other hand, picks an object within the puzzle and build the pieces out from that one image. Edges and corners are fairly insignificant to him. Weller Inn, Look Out! We've got another puzzler on our hands.
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